In which I fall victim to Swiss hairdryer wind disease

This morning when I woke up, I didn’t feel quite right. It wasn’t a headache, or nausea, or anything I could really put my finger on, but something was wrong. By this afternoon, I still wasn’t feeling better, but I headed out to meet some friends for drinks anyway. On the walk there I felt a little dizzy, and wondered what in the world was wrong with me.

I arrived safely at the café (Corazon in Niederdorf – nice place) and tried to explain to my friends the weird way my day was going. After I described my nebulous symptoms, Laurie proudly shouted her diagnosis: “It’s the Föhn!”

Allow me to explain a little something about this culture. German-speaking Europeans are constantly complaining about made-up illnesses. Like their ubiquitous Kreislauf problems (“Ow, my circulation!”). Or the mysterious diseases brought on by moving air or cold kidneys. So when I heard about how the Swiss think that the Föhn causes them to have wacky symptoms, I wasn’t exactly surprised.

Föhn (which is similar to the German word for hairdryer) is the name of certain warm winds that come over the Alps and cause temperatures to rise drastically. Given that we were having a big snowstorm a couple days ago, but are now back to sitting outdoors at sidewalk cafes, I’m guessing the Föhn might actually be blowing these days. But is it actually responsible for my symptoms? I’m guessing no. Unless you think I’ve been acting a wee bit more psychotic than usual lately? Wait, don’t answer that.

21 thoughts on “In which I fall victim to Swiss hairdryer wind disease”

  3. You forgot to mention their fear of air conditioning. I distinctly remember a co-worker telling me that he had gotten a bit sick because he had to spend the day in the air conditioned lab near the fan.

  4. Perhaps I was already impacted by the Föhn? That’s why I got the date mixed up.

    Next thing you know I will be glaring at people who dare to allow a breeze into the overheated tram before huffily walking over and slamming the window shut.

    Let’s say it all together:

    Viruses and bacteria cause illness.

    Not wind or fans or even going outside with wet hair.

  5. The first time I ever heard about a fan causing an illness I thought the world had gone nuts (well, it is nuts but that’s another story). Perhaps the reasoning behind the blow dryer sickness is explained by the change in atmospheric pressure…which we all know can reek havoc on sinuses.

  6. It’s pretty ironic to read American lecturing foreigners about made-up illnesses. You gave the world PTSD, PMD, ADHD and the glorious SAD; you seem pretty skilled at constructing illnesses too.
    AC gives me headache and soar throat, just like the Foehn; it’s a fact. Call me stupid, if you feel that you’re more informed and wiser; that won’t make my soar throat and my headache go away.

  7. Alain, I assure you that I personally did not give the world any of those illnesses. Please stop confusing me with the US government or medical researchers.

    And why do you want me to call you stupid? Not knowing you, I have no clue how informed or wise you are (though I have to say this comment isn’t making you appear either).

  11. After years of assuring my Swiss husband that he’s full of crap about the Foehn, I have in the past year or so found myself blaming my headaches and some nights of insomnia on the Foehn. Next thing you know I’ll start believing in “Spring Tiredness.”

  12. it is so frustrating to be surrounded by otherwise totally intelligent, rational, fricking SCIENTISTS (all of whom in this case happen to be German/Austrian) who are convinced that the air conditioning, riding in the car with the windows down, not drying their hair before they go outside, and radiant floor heating are all really really bad for their health.

  14. This post had me in stitches! The first time I heard about it was when my boyfriend’s mother warned me about it last autumn… I had the hardest time keeping a straight face! Needless to say we (the boy and I) went out for a long bike ride anyway. We were really tired afterward, must have been the Föhn!

  15. Every time I get a headache, swiss DH blames it on some wind or another! Must be the one you’re talking about. I do think it’s terribly romantic that the winds each have a name though, instead of just identifying it by the direction it’s coming from like the boring old American forecasters.

  16. I just learned about Foehn in my German class last week … It reminds me of the strange, warm wind in Los Angeles … that got folks all stirred up (the name of which now escapes me of course …)

    Feel better …

    R

  18. This is great. It’s reassuring to know that this kind of stuff (A/C, “taking wind”) isn’t only in Italy.

    And Alain, I won’t call you stupid, even though you asked so nicely, but I do have just one question: how in the world does your throat manage to soar? I guess it must be carried along on the winds of the Foehn…

  20. Isn’t it interesting that somebody could find it strange that scientists might assume that things like the wheather or air conditioning could have an influence one one’s well-being?

    Assuming that a rapid change in temperature, or hot nights in non-air-conditioned buildings (and the sleepless nights that brings with itself) might be bad for your well-being does not strike me as particularly irrational. Quite the contrary, in fact.

    But of course, I’m Swiss.

  21. Come on now, Not only virus and bacteria make you sick. The fohn winds are know to make people act strange and pychotic sometimes. Illnesses like depression, headaches, diziness are sometimes related to these winds. Google it a bit to understand it.

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